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Today we are going to talk about bedtime routines! For some parents, there is a feeling of dread as the evening comes to an end, but now you have to battle your kids for over an hour to get them to bed.
It doesn’t have to be this way!!! My husband and I can get our 2 and 4-year-old to bed in about 15 minutes.
Let’s dive into our strategy and how we make this work.
Prep Work
Before the routine fully gets started, I will typically make a quick trip to my children’s rooms and do some prep. I will do this at 7:45 PM at the latest. Sometimes I will randomly do it earlier in the evening, depending on the day.
Just for a bit of context, our girls have a Hatch Light in each of their rooms. The light turns red and the white noise comes on at 8:00 PM. This means on an ideal night we are giving them cuddles and out of their rooms at about 8:05 PM.
Back to my prep work.
The list of prep includes setting out jammies, closing the blinds and curtains, setting out vitamins, and sometimes preloading the toothbrushes with toothpaste.
All of this prep can take two minutes. We live in a single-story home, so it is a matter of walking a few feet to the bedrooms, bathroom, and kitchen.
While I am in their bedrooms, I will tidy up any toys and distractions that are out. This way we can better focus on bedtime.
A little bit of prep work goes a long way.
Usually during this time, my husband will work with our girls on cleaning up any toys still out in the living room.
Bedtime
Next, we are going to start setting the tone for bedtime. Dim the lights in the living spaces. Turn off the TV if needed.
We are getting up and verbally telling our children it is bedtime. This is between 7:45 and 7:50 PM. All of this is happening fairly quickly and smoothly.
Our family is on the same page about what is happening and when.
We are helping our kids along with their routines and getting them ready for bed. I set out the jammies to give my 4-year-old the option of trying to be more independent in getting ready. Sometimes they are interested and sometimes they are not.
This is a time to help your children stay on track and keep them moving forward. You should not be running around the house doing random chores or activities. You should not be scrolling your phone.
Keep them focused and on track. And if they are still little like our 2-year-old you are fully helping them through each step.
One thing we do, if we find our 4-year-old getting distracted, is ask them what is next on their list.
Now we do not have a real list anywhere. You could explore a written list, picture list, magnet system, or some other option.
Here are some links to lists you may be interested in trying:
What we do though is hold up our hand, as an imaginary list, and remind them of what they have done.
Example:
Hold up your hand and say.
“Jammies….check”
“Vitamin…check”
Then we will ask them what is next and if they are having difficulty we will say, “brush teeth is next.”
And they might say “not check” and run to do it.
If you can picture it, I hold my left hand up, open and flat. I use my right hand to pretend I am holding a pen and make a pretend check mark motion.
It is a simple and silly way to keep your older toddler/young child focused.
Routine
Ok, so what is our actual routine? I will take you through it real quick, but honestly, I don’t feel the steps in the routine are what matter, instead it is how you do the steps.
You will probably say we do the same thing as you, but it takes us 2 hours! What are we doing wrong?!
Real Quick:
7:40/7:45 Mom doing prep work while Dad and kids tidy up the main living room
7:45 kids go to the kitchen to get vitamins and a drink if they want it
7:46 girls head to their rooms to get jammies and a diaper for the 2-year-old. Typically mom helps the 2-year-old with the diaper change and getting them dressed.
Sometimes the 4-year-old gets help from Dad sometimes they don’t
7:50 We are getting their teeth brushed
7:53 The 4-year-old is going potty. Sometimes we run a brush through their hair around this time.
Now at this point, we have done some varying routines. We have done Bible reading together and separately. We have done prayers and just slightly different steps. The 2-year-old has had varying attention spans as to be expected for her age.
We separate at this point. One parent takes the 2-year-old in their room for cuddles. They get a pacifier and cuddles then placed down in their crib and time after 8 PM. Usually, we are out by 8:05 PM.
The other parent is with the 4-year-old. In their room, they will either get a book or a Bible story.
Then they typically come out for one last drink of water. Then back in their room for quick cuddles and tucked into bed.
Typically, we are leaving the 4-year-old’s room between 8:05 and 8:10 PM. This will depend on how early we start reading the book, how long it is, and if our 4-year-old is feeling chatty.
That is it! That is the routine. We sometimes slightly changed the steps or the order, but the overall routine is the same.
One more thing that helps keep us on track is the Hatch Night Light and Sound Machine.
In both our girls’ rooms we have a Hatch Light, at 8 PM it is scheduled to turn red, and the white noise sound comes on. This signals that it is bedtime.
The Hatch light is also a huge part of our morning wake-up routine. If you want to learn more about the Hatch light click here….4 Benefits of Introducing the Hatch Light Before Transitioning Out of the Crib.
Both Parents or Only One Parent
A little more info on our routine.
We alternate parents each night.
This way both children get equal bedtime with mom and dad. We are both typically home to do bedtime, however, if one of us is gone the parent at home can easily handle both kids. We may need to start the routine slightly earlier and we have to modify the end.
We do everything the same until the final put down portion. The 2-year-old gets put to bed first while the 4-year-old waits in her room with a book. The single parent at home then goes to the 4-year-old, reads the books, and puts them to bed.
My point being, this routine makes it so we can change things up, but still get it done. Our children know exactly what to expect with one parent or two.
Bath Time
I do not consider bath time part of our bedtime routine. We do not bathe our children every night. On nights that we do, that gets placed in front of the entire bedtime routine. We start early enough to get it done on time.
If you want to learn a bit more about how we do bath time and check out some tips, click here…10 Simple but Effective Tips for a Fun and Stress-Free Baby Bath Time.
Conclusion
So how do we do it? To put it simply – consistency, routine, and being on the same page. We keep our house on track with structure and organization.
Our children also have expectations that we teach them over time. During the bedtime routine, they know they can’t start playing with dolls or get out Legos. That simply doesn’t happen. They understand it is bedtime and that we have tasks to complete.
How can you do it too?!
Keep your kids focused.
Keep the structure both simple and consistent.
Keep repeating it each night and make it clear that you are staying on task.
Over time this will shorten the bedtime routine.
Take a moment and think about the steps that are a part of your bedtime routine.
How long does it take you? Realistically how long SHOULD it take you?
Let’s work on making it make sense.
Check Out My Articles
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4 Benefits of Introducing the Hatch Night Light While Still in the Baby Crib
10 Simple but Effective Tips for a Fun and Stress-Free Baby Bath Time
