How to Best Navigate the Weaning Process with Your Baby -

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The weaning process is a tough one. We work so hard to establish breastfeeding. Some moms really struggle. They push through tongue ties, nipple shields, mastitis and so much more. Then you get to this place of wanting or needing to end the journey.

It seems crazy to end something that you worked so hard for and at for so long. Maybe you are weaning at 6 months or maybe you are weaning at 16 months. It doesn’t matter. You invested your time, energy, love, and life into breastfeeding your child. You sacrificed sleep for them. You shared a part of your body to take care of your child.

Now it is time to call it quits. Maybe you are burned out. For some their body has naturally started drying up. Maybe your baby is losing interest. It could just be time to be done. Whatever the reason it is ok. All good things must come to an end.

Some of you may have loved breastfeeding and others may have forced themselves to push through.

Let’s talk about how we can end this journey as smoothly as possible for both you and your child.

Early Weaning

Go as slowly as you can manage!

Everyone weans in their own way.

I suggest you take out one feeding at a time in the ways that most make sense to your family.

The first feeding I dropped was one around lunch time. My child was eating food and therefore did not need to nurse at this time. Then we took out the one before dinner, like in that 4 pm range. Maybe this is a good time to start having an afternoon snack of solid food instead of milk.

During the weaning process, I encourage you to think about obstacles ahead. Don’t stress, but rather prepare.

Do you nurse your baby to sleep?

This is a big one.

If you nurse your baby to sleep start adding other things to your routine.

Nurse and then read a book or brush their teeth. If possible have your partner join you in the bedtime process.

The slower you wean the better your body will handle the changes. Your milk will slowly decrease.

If you want to read more in depth about how I weaned my daughter in the early stages take a look at How to Stop Breastfeeding and Gently Wean Your Baby.

Late Weaning

Late weaning is when you are nearing the end. Maybe you are down to one or two feedings per day.

You may start noticing emotions whether from you or your child.

Four days before the end of our weaning journey I started to notice our daughter having more emotions than normal. Her naps were off and she needed extra cuddles.

At this point, we were down to only nursing once a day before bedtime. My husband was waking her up in the morning and getting her dressed to help with ending the morning feeding.

You should expect emotions. Your baby or child knows things are happening. They are likely missing breastfeeding from you. It is a seriously strong bond and connection.

The further you get in your weaning process the more you need to help your child succeed.

Your partner needs to be stepping up. Like I mentioned my husband stated getting our daughter up and ready for the day. I would get myself dully dressed and ready for the day during this time.

I was intentionally dressing in hoodies or high-neck shirts. When I did make my appearance out in the living room I made sure to not sit in the location that I typically nursed my daughter. I would instead sit on the floor and engage her with toys.

Four days out from ending our nursing journey I started to feel emotionally exhausted. My body was physically doing ok in the sense of not experiencing engorgement or comfortability. My emotions started to crash. I’ll touch more on this later, but post-weaning depression is a thing. The crash can start during your weaning process as well.

The Last Time Nursing

This is it. This is the last evening nursing session. We are done. My mind is solid in this decision. My daughter doesn’t know it yet, but that was her last time nursing.

I will not wavier in this decision or cause her any confusion.

I am ok tonight. I have cried days leading up to this point, but not tonight. Tonight I am at peace with my decision.

The Week After Weaning

Day one after weaning my husband put our daughter to bed. We made sure during the evening to give her lots of attention and try to burn off her energy. We did though do normal parts of our bedtime routine. Your baby should be tired and be ready for bed if you are putting them to bed for the first time without breastfeeding.

On day two I started to feel engorgement. This is nothing extreme just a little bit of discomfort. This is perfectly normal. You could choose to pump a little to relieve pressure if necessary. I did not go the pumping route. I waited it out.

The engorgement made it uncomfortable to sleep and hold my daughter. I felt discomfort every time she pushed against my chest.

By day three my chest starting getting hard. For about 5 days straight my breasts were pretty hard. A lot of people would decide to pump. I did not do so. This is a personal choice. If you feel like mastitis is coming on or you are too uncomfortable to handle it consider pumping.

If you decide to pump only do so a little. Do not completely empty your breasts; this will cause your body to produce more milk. The goal is to dry up your supply.

So to recap at 8 days out I was still suffering engorgement.

I really thought by day 5 I would be all good. I weaned very slowly. I did not expect it to take this long.

Day ten things started to get better. I woke up this morning feeling like my body turned a corner.

Weaning Depression

I want to make sure all mommas that are going through the weaning process realize it is completely normal to have feelings of depression during this time.

Completely Normal

Even during the early weaning stages, I started to feel the depression creeping in. I felt tired and lacked energy. I felt sad and like I was a bad mom. More and more I felt emotional about things.

Part of the emotion was of course knowing that our breastfeeding journey was ending, but it did at times seem more than that.

I took a step back and realized this is a huge hormonal swing for my body.

Just think about how you felt when you got pregnant. The emotions you felt. During your pregnancy did you ever cry for no real reason?

Or how about when you gave birth? Did you experience any postpartum depression or anxiety? Did you get emotional and overwhelmed at times?

I believe weaning is the third and final major hormonal swing a mother experiences with a child. If you breastfeed for any length of time though you get away from the birth and postpartum time. You stop thinking about your body in the same hormonal way you did back then.

Asking for Help

I just want to let you know that you should anticipate weaning depression. And definitely warn your partner that this is a normal thing that you may experience.

The moment I realized what was happening I explained to my husband that my body is going through this huge hormonal change again and I am going to cry. Just let me cry.

It will be ok. I will get through this, but in the meantime just let me feel what I feel and work my way through this.

I also recommend explaining the situation to your partner so they can watch for anything distressing. We all know about educating partners to watch for any dangerous symptoms with postpartum depression, but they need to watch for post-weaning depression as well.

I am not saying you are going to hurt your child. But may you get stuck in a rut and need help finding your way out.

If you are experiencing this reach out to sources for help.